The aim of pachinko is to drop balls from the top of a machine to the bottom of the machine, the machine being a brightly colored candy curved piece of metal, glass and plastic, pumping circa 1993 rave music with epilepsy inducing super cutey anime type graphics flashing at you to "drop.... more.... balls" while pretending some skill is involved most players have a death like grip on, and occasionally turn, a small dial at the side of the machine that is supposed to affect the dropping of the balls.

The more balls come out the bottom of the machine, the chances for big prizes...like a TV, video camera, etc...all which you can handily pawn for hard cash at conveniently located "style shops" next to pachinko parlors.

I've tried it twice after being intrigued by a fellow co-workers conversations...

"Ah ! X- san what did you do at the weekend ?"

A glazed look, I re-ask the question in Japanese even though this guy speaks English, met by another glazed look.

"しゅまつ ? weekend ? 　なに ? what do ?"

Tugs heavily on cigarette, still looking a million miles away, "pachsuroto", the words fall from his mouth like tiered turds.

"You win anything ?" I always asked.

"No..." he would reply, with the enthusiasm of drift wood.

It was these riveting conversations led me to try it for myself, to see if it would brighten my personality as it did for X-san.

I sat for about 2 hours desperately trying to get rid of the balls I paid for, just to get out of the smoke filled, cheezy trance music pumping neon hellhole, but only more bloody balls kept coming out the bottom. (And I wasn't even diddling about with the dial).

For fear of not getting it I attended a second time, only to have my conscience scream "WHATS THE POINT OF THIS !?!?!" leaving a bucket of balls behind.

Still, that's me. Each to their own, there are some people queue from 5am in the morning for good seats and some mums abandon their kids for days just to play the game.

Go figure.