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How to stop a drunk woman
 We've all been there; Your with your wife, girlfriend, or female friend. They've had a few, there getting to become a handful. They're beginning to go beyond respectable drunk and going further, the worst there is; yes I'm talking about when a woman gets "man drunk". I once heard a man with a lot of sense say: "A drunk man looks foolish, but a drunk woman looks insane"There are sure-fire words, actions or phrases that will NOT stop your female company from drinking. Here are a few that will ensure 100% disaster, fallout, argument and quite possibly a full scale barfight, and woman being dragged into the street showing a bit of her tights or pants with her hair half stuck to her face with vomit.
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
July 12, 2009 9:07 PM
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Sender: Mr "Please do not bend"
Now, don't get me wrong, the Japanese Postal service is the most courteous and efficient in the world. They deliver letters to your house at 3 intervals through the day, so effectively you get 3 possible times for delivery in a day.
If you happen to be out at any of these times they will leave a note to say they tried to deliver something, which if you phone within that day up until 7pm they will send a guy out to deliver it to your house whenever you specify (within reason).
This one had to make me laugh a bit though. The sender is marked as "Please do not bend"様 then struck out and an arrow pointing to 外国 - FOREIGN!
Even though it was actually from within Japan, the poor postman, credit to him, gave a go at reading who it was from, carefully wrote it down then probably thought, "That's an odd name... ahhh SHITE ! Acchh its from someone foreign!"
Made me a chuckle a bit, what if there was a "Mr Please Do not Bend",a kind of very brittle, stiff upright character; unmovable neck, rotating his whole body through life.
Everyday situations being extremely fragile.
"Hey ken I'd like you to meet someone this is Mr Please Do Not Bend, he's from FOREIGN"
"Ah Hi there! Nice to meet you" motions to shake hands.
"DON'T TOUCH HIM HE'LL BREAK !" introducer screams and pulls away hand
"Sorry I should have guessed, My apologies"
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
June 28, 2009 3:27 PM
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喫煙所-きつえんしょ-smoking areas
Much like the rest of the world, Japan is slowly catching up on the
current anti smoking trends.
Though 30% of the population are smokers
compared to a lowly 18% in the states, smoking in public areas is
beginning to be frowned upon.
Recent provision of 喫煙所 smoking areas gives smokers an area to obey
"smoking manners". Many areas now prohibit smoking while walking in
public most notably Akihabara, where you can receive a 5,000 yen fine
for having a "lit cigarette". Strange how that term has entered the
lexicon of "danger" words, you would think it was a "loaded gun".
Still, it makes sense in areas as condensely crowded as Akiba.
Banned smoking in restaurants, bars and cafes is still a long way
away; Starbucks in Japan is one of the few countries left in the world
where you can enjoy the age old combo classic of "a cup of joe and a
smoke" without venturing to an outside ashtray.
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
November 4, 2008 8:01 PM
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Cruising the Anime City
Picked this up at Tower records recently, by the infamous uber-otaku-geek Patrick Macias, it's a real treat and geek porn at its best.
The book looks at and celebrates the whole spectrum of otaku (geek) culture from the staples of Anime and Games to the more obscure Moe* and Dojinshi* in the form of a guide and explanatory FAQ like format.
I would hazard a guess to say Macias has primarily aimed the book at
the Otaku tourist, visiting Japan for the sole purpose of shopping.
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
May 31, 2008 6:28 PM
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jellyfish

The Japanese word for Jellyfish is 海月- くらげ - kurage (interesting note : means "sea moon") not to be confused with からあげ-karage which means fried foods (especially chicken)
So next time your in Japanese company, dining out, and you say "This
jellyfish is lovely! I wish I could eat it every day!" make sure you
know what you're talking about and don't look like a massive fanny like
I did...
*>_<*
Similarly avoid entering sea waters with poisonous "fried chicken"...
That aside, Jellyfish are fascinating blobs aren't they? The same could be said for us humans!
Photos of "Kasai Water Park Fried Chicken Exhibition....(Good name for a band...)
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
April 10, 2007 4:41 PM
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Criminal - げしゅにん だ!
I dunno who this guy is, but he's "wanted", whoever he is.
He's got a missing left digit indicating former (ie disgraced) lower gangland connections clearly outlined on the poster.
Thing
is I haven't seen this poster anywhere other than Toei Shinjuku line or
Hanzomon line ,since its limited to the subway I'm guessing he's a bum
fiddler on crowded trains, added to my initial kanji misreadings, I
interpreted him as a "chikan" - 痴漢 - meaning "pervert" as the sound
"chi" (the latter part of his name) looks like 地.(see the poster and do
the math...)
Funnily
though the two kanji that make the words pervert in Japanese individual
meanings are "foolish" and "sino" or "Chinese"...offensive no ?
Whoever
he is, if YOU are travelling on shinjuku line, be on the look out for
an ex yakuza Chinese pervert and turn him in so that regular fully
digited Japanese men can hassle girls in short skirts...But seriously I
wonder what a bedragled looking tierd guy like this could have done to
have sparked so many wanted posters ?
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
July 4, 2006 4:56 PM
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家庭画報 - Kateigaho

I've long seen this magazine in Tower, HMV and other foreign selling bookstores in Japan, so I went the whole hog and picked up a few of their back issues.
It's billed as Japans International Arts & Culture magazine,
while it does have some very culturally interesting articles, some of
the arts features are definitely aimed at more feminine audiences - I
just can't whip enthusiasm up for new ranges of Jewellery with
traditional Japanese designs. Saying that it does feature some nice
articles on general design, food and architecture.
I'm not sure I'm its target audience, seems aimed at the Rich
Roppongi expatriate crowd, though it does have interest for common old
Joes like myself.
Definitely one to subscribe to if I ever return back to blighty
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
January 24, 2006 5:07 PM
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誕生日 Birthday Party
 Just got back from Golden Week holiday and got all the friends round for a mexican cook out and console tomfoolery. The menu was Salad, Quesedillas, Salsa, Beef Chilli, Guacamole, Chicken Fajitas and CAKE ! As you can see the NES emulator was providing much nostalgic entertainment.Known as Famicom in Japan I think every Japanese person in Japan has a "Famicon" favourite or memory. Everyone was exchanging "you do it that way !? that's stupid, you miss that block with the super mushroom !" I always was useless at original Mario Bros, I'm more a SNES Super Mario Land guy... <excuses-excuses> By 5 o clock I was exhausted from cooking and all the eating, beer and cake, I ended up falling asleep and waking at 10 where everybody was still in full flow! By that time the PS2 EyeToy was on the go and everyone was bustling about the room, avoiding virtual punches or dancing in time to some virtual disco diva.I joined in for an hour or so but was knackered and then back to bed...Must be getting old.... though the party theme had a mental age of about 14. =)
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
May 1, 2005 12:29 PM
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Christmas - お帰り
It's been 1 year and 6 months since I've set foot in Scotland.
Last year for Christmas I opted to stay in Japan, after all it had only been 6 months since I arrived and I didn't want to return home only to get homesick.
So this Christmas I felt a return home was in order and would also be introducing my girlfriend to my parents.
This isn't her first time in UK but first time in Scotland, so I think she will be quite surprised what a remote area I come from.
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
December 30, 2004 11:19 PM
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A Proper Job !
 or "How I made it out of the Eikaiwa Ghetto !"
Well its now no secret; I have finally returned to the bosom of IT and gained what I would consider proper employment in Japan. The company is in Shibuya, which is quite a distance from where I live in Chiba (the burbs hick town of Tokyo). Commuting is going to take about 2hours a day each way, so thats 4hrs travelling everyday. Core time is 10 till 7, hour for lunch, half Japanese and Foreign staff (about 50/50 mix). Its quite an interestign mix as the development team are all foreigners; American, Australian, English,French & Scottish. Very multicultural ! Sounds like there could almost be a punchline or a joke some where in there.The staff are really friendly and easy going and its great being able to speak and practice Japanese with my co-workers.
The work is mainly PHP and its quite tricky learning the ropes again. 1 year and 6 months of teaching English can crush those core skills ! Its been 3 weeks now and seems like I'm settling in.
At the moment look like I will be here for a good while after many months of surfing for job vacancies, many of which seemed inapplicable I was invited for interview and passed after 2 weeks notice. I'm finally FREE from eikaiwa !
or so I thought, until I tried to hand my notice in.....flame on
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Posted by
sasqwach
at
November 29, 2004 3:46 PM
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